Thursday, March the 11th, 2004

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Blatant Forgeries Received

Someone has been forging correspondence from a dead German aeronautical engineer. Unless the culprit owns up by the end of the day, the whole readership will stay behind and polish the Buttons of Beb—every last one of them!

Dear Sir : Idly perusing your website today, whilst clinging unsteadily to a flagpole, gripping my laptop in my teeth and attempting to push several envelopes into the telephone box attached to the top, I couldn't help noticing your Mission Statement (10th March). Surely, I thought to myself, there are lessons here for us all, innit. As a result, I have revised my life's goals, abandoned my attempts to understand traditional Japanese theatre – surely the ultimate Noh-brainer – and returned to my first love: designing V2 missiles and working for NASA. It is, after all, rocket science.


Yrs etc,
Werner von Braun

Please note that while one foolish reader has been frittering their time away on this counterfeit, here in the serried belvederes of Haemoglobin Towers we have embarked upon the important task of devising a “Mission Statement Lite”, which will be launched soon.