Monday, February the 7th, 2005

back to: title, date or indexes

New Saints

The ailing Pope has kept very busy in the last few years, beatifying and canonising with gay abandon and creating more new saints than any of his predecessors for hundreds of years. I try to keep abreast of these important matters, but I fear that one of the new saints escaped my attention. This morning, to my shame, I did some shopping in Tesco, that temple of Mammon owned by the wretched “Lady” Shirley Porter, who is long overdue for criminal prosecution. Browsing through the cheeses, I noticed a sign announcing a special offer on “Saint Ague”. (Nearby was a stack of packets of Saint Agur, a delightful creamy blue cheese from the Auvergne.) I have never come across Saint Ague before, so he or she must be one of the new ones. I must check to see if Il Papa has also created Saint Pox, Saint Bubo, Saint Plague and Saint Black Bile, among others.